Exceptional Lives Community Member
on
August 22, 2020

How can I connect with my child who prefers to be alone?

Marcela Mota Aversa is a Clinician & Early Education Mental Health Consultant at The Home For Little Wanderers and a Gallery Educator at the Museum of Fine Art in Boston. In this video clip she answers "how can I stay connected with my child when he seems to prefer to be alone?" This question is…

 

YouTube video

Another question. How do I stay connected with my child, who wants to be alone, a lot, without feeling that I’m pushing my way into his space?

Um, again, we don’t know the age of this child, but um, wanting to be alone into his own space, it’s typical, normal. — I don’t know if you can hear the train and desirable behavior for a young um-uh, preteen. So, um, if your child is 11, 12, 13 that’s just not only normal, but desirable. So, um, it seems that he’s emerging into his own identity. And what I would do is, knock the door, ask for an appointment. Ask for a “date” in the kitchen, for a cup of tea, or-or some ice seltzer water, and honor his dignity, as an emergent person, that it seems that he’s trying to become. And then, if he doesn’t want to hang out, just let it be, as long as he doesn’t seem, as-as you don’t see, other signs that might suggest depression. Um, and-and if he’s in that age range, I think that that’s normal, desirable here.

 

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