(Listen to this content instead on our Podcast— Just Needs Episode 19 — 6 ways to be a fierce advocate for your child)
Being a great advocate for your child with disabilities is not easy. If your child is in Special Education, you probably already know that sometimes we have to push a little to make sure our kids are getting their needs met. Here are 5 tips to help you be as effective as possible.
1. Keep your child at the center of everything.
Relationships between schools and Special Education families can be difficult. One way to create a solid foundation is to start with the assumption that everyone’s goal is to help your child. Keep your child’s needs at the heart of everything.
When it feels like the school may be doing something that doesn’t work for your child, it’s easy to get upset. Keep calm and approach the conversation with curiosity. You may want to ask something like “This isn’t happening the way I thought it was meant to. Can you help me understand what’s going on, so we can work through it?” or “What can we do together to meet my child’s needs here?”
2. Learn about Special Education and what it means for your child.
Having a solid handle on how Special Education works will help you understand what the school can and should do to meet your child’s needs.
The ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) and Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act ensure their right to equal access to all public services. IDEA (Individuals with Disabilities Education Act) guarantees the right to a “free and appropriate education (FAPE)”. It’s important to understand these rights and how they apply to your child’s IEP process.
If your child has an IEP or a 504 plan, it’s important to understand the details and what they mean. Do you know what a Least Restrictive Environment is? Or if it’s worth asking if your child qualifies for an Extended School Year? When you know how the system works, you’ll have an understanding of what the school can or can’t do, and what to ask for if your child isn’t making progress.
You don’t have to become a Special Education expert! You just need to learn what questions to ask.
(Tip: Use our Special Ed Glossary to make sure you understand all of the acronyms and jargon in the school paperwork.)
3. Get to know your child’s team.
Studies show that, when families are engaged with their child’s education and work closely with the school, children have better social skills, school attendance, and academic performance.
When you make an effort to get to know the adults who work with your child at school, you:
- Give them a chance to learn more about your child and your family
- Help them learn what works and doesn’t work for your child
- Learn skills to support your child’s academics at home
- Open up opportunities for on-going communication in both directions
You can get to know them however it works for you. Maybe you show up at school events. Or you introduce yourself with a friendly note by email. Or you make a point of saying hi and asking the teacher about their weekend when you pick up your child.
When you build a real relationship with your child’s teacher or team member, you’re more likely to have a meaningful discussion about your child’s progress and how you can help them at home.
(Bonus tip: teachers are never sad when you ask them for their coffee order).
Building these relationships takes some work and time. But when you put the effort in, it’s easier to navigate any bumps in the road.
4. Keep great records.
Keep a folder or log to track your communication with the school. Special Education can involve a lot of meetings, messages, and paperwork. Well-kept records can help to keep everything in one place and track the moving parts.
For example: schools have complicated timelines to follow. If you ask for a Special Ed evaluation, they have 5 days to send you a consent form. Once you sign and return it, they have 30 days to do the evaluation. But they only count school days, not weekends or holidays, so it can be easy to lose track of when things should be happening. Keeping your requests on file can help you track the timelines and follow up with the school if they are behind or something has gone wrong.
Good records can also help you remember what you discussed in an IEP meeting or what was going on at a particularly difficult time for your child. This can also help you spot patterns, like maybe your child struggles with their behavior most in mid-winter, but improves once they can play outside every day.
Tip: if you don’t like to keep track of folders and paperwork, use your phone camera or free scanner app on your phone (we like this one) and keep everything in an electronic file.
5. Don’t be afraid to speak up.
Legally, you are a part of your child’s IEP team. And you are probably the ONLY person who stays on your child’s IEP team from day 1 until they finish high school. So if you have questions or ideas, bring them to your child’s team.
Some parents feel like they shouldn’t weigh in on their child’s Special Education services because they aren’t educators. But you ARE the expert in your child. If something is worrying you, speak up!
It’s not easy to advocate effectively for your child. No one wants to be the squeaky wheel, but Special Education is complicated and things don’t always go exactly as we hope. If you follow these tips and enlist the school staff as your partner, you can look out for your child’s interests and help them succeed. Keep calm, learn your stuff, and stay involved. It will be worth the effort!
Learn More:
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My child is in special education. What should I know about IDEA?
- How do I partner with the school to support my child?
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The Impact of Racism on Discipline for Students of Color with Disabilities
