If you’re a General Education teacher or a school administrator, you probably spend a fair amount of your time supporting and communicating with the families of your students. You’re holding parent-teacher conferences, sending progress reports, answering messages about homework, and going to IEP meetings. And you know that when a child is newly diagnosed with a disability or learning difference, it can be a hard time for families. You want to support parents of students who are new to Special Ed, but may need some guidance.
Here are 5 ways to support parents of students who are new to Special Education
1. Normalize the disability
Parents’ perspectives are often limited to their own children. When my first child was young, I had no basis for comparison. When my second child was young, my frame of reference was mostly about her older brother. It was pretty limited.
Partly because of this, a new diagnosis can bring up a lot of worries. Parents may be wondering if their child will be ok. Will they be able to learn what they need to know? Will they graduate? What about the stigma of Special Education? Of the diagnosis itself?
As a teacher, you have a much broader perspective on the range of child development and learning. You are in a great position to let the parents know that so many children with the same or similar disability thrive. You can also remind them that “thriving” can and does look different from one child to the next.
2. Really listen to the family’s concerns and questions.
Chances are, they have a lot – but they are not always what you might expect. So start by asking questions and really listening to what they tell you. Sometimes families need that more than they need answers.
Here are some of the questions and concerns that may come up:
- Does my child really have a disability or need extra help?
Families may not fully understand what this disability means. Or they may come from another country or culture where disability is seen very differently than in the U.S. Or they may not be ready to accept how much their child is struggling or falling behind. Or they may not trust the school’s assessment.
Hear the family out. This will take some time, patience, and empathy.
- Stigma at home or in the community
Families may accept who their child is but worry that others will not. Maybe they are concerned other people will not see how smart their child is. Or they are worried that others won’t believe the diagnosis. It’s true that many people don’t understand disabilities and learning differences. You can help the families work through this and find language to talk to their family and friends.
- “I was in Special Education and it was awful. I don’t want that for my child. “
Parents who also have disabilities or who struggled in school may have had an awful experience in Special Ed and worry their child will have a similar experience. Listen to their concerns and talk to them about what looks different now than when they were growing up. Talk with them about concepts like Least Restrictive Environment and other laws that can ensure their child’s experience is different from their own.
- How will they ever learn to read/graduate from high school/get a job (and so on…)?
Many times, when a child is newly diagnosed, families go into panic mode. One thing to remember is that parents may not really understand the disability. Or they think they understand but their information is inaccurate and scary. So, a great starting point is to make sure families understand what this disability does (and does not) mean for their child.
If they are ready, it might be helpful to talk to them about what other students with similar disabilities have accomplished, both in school and later in life. Talk to them about the ways in which Special Ed services can not only help them learn more while they are in school, but will also help them gain skills they will need for their lives after school, when they don’t have the same accommodations.
3. Make sure they understand the IEP process
The Special Ed process can be very overwhelming, particularly at the beginning. There are legal guidelines, confusing timelines, and a boatload of jargon and acronyms.
You can help walk the family through the process and make sure they have all the information they need. Help them understand what they can expect at their first IEP meeting.
If you are a Gen Ed teacher, you may feel like you don’t know enough either. That’s ok! Share what you know and help connect them to someone who might be able to answer questions that you can’t answer.
When you go out of your way to support the family this way, you’re not just making it easier on the family, you’re also building trust. And trust is the foundation of a smooth Special Ed process.
4. Keep communication open
Make sure families know who they can reach out to if they have questions. Find out what kind of information they would like to hear from you or other members of their child’s team. Let them know you are available to them.
Knowing all of this is reassuring to families at a really anxious time, and it’s also likely to help you get information you need to support your student.
5. Connect them to resources for support
Families may be looking for all sorts of resources and information.
They may need a family support group, social skills groups for their child, or other services in their community (check out our Disability Services Finder for Louisiana and Massachusetts).
They may want to read more about related services like Occupational Therapy or Speech Therapy.
They may want more information about the IEP process, about Special Ed in general, or about their child’s diagnosis.
They may not even know that their child might qualify for Medicaid or Social Security.
Offer resources to help them learn what they want to know, support their child and feel connected to their community. This will be tremendously helpful and build their trust in you. You don’t have to have all the information to offer up starting points. And we can help you with that!
If you are working to support parents of students who are new to Special Education, your empathy and willingness to listen goes a long way. Teachers, you’ve got this. Your efforts matter.
